ADD MY BACKUP PAGE PLEASE=] AND LEAVE ME LOVE THERE THANKS=] ALSO DID U SIGN MY GUESTBOOK? CAN U PLZ THANKS HUNNI:) OH YEH LET ME KNOW IF U FIND OUT WHICH AUTOGRAPH ON MY PAGE IS MESSING UP MY MUSIC I GOTTA GET IT OFF MY PAGE!!

Make your own banner at MyBannerMaker.com!

I filled out a resume for a "dream job" today. I also sent 2 other attachments: 1 newsletter I created and a skills sheet. I hope something comes out of this. The greatest gift I did, was I did follow through. I got this notice of a job on Tuesday night. Today is Friday .. I did it timely and gave serious thought to it.

GOD BLESS, HUGS DIANA.

A geek's list of thanks
1. Be thankful you haven't been spammed!

2. Be thankful your computer isn't down!

3. Be thankful your favorite forum isn't down!

4. Be thankful you don't have The Good Times virus!

5. Be thankful your server isn't down!

6. Be thankful for a vast selection of Web sites to browse!

7. Be thankful no one knows who you really are!

8. Be thankful someone sent you a cyber sundae, and you didn't gain a pound!

9. Be thankful your 28 year old cyberfriend really isn't 72!

10. Be thankful for a fast Internet connection!

11. Be thankful no one sent you a cyber voo-doo doll!

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How to Cook a Turkey

Step 1: Go buy a turkey
Step 2: Take a drink of whiskey, scotch, or JD
Step 3: Put turkey in the oven
Step 4: Take another 2 drinks of whiskey
Step 5: Set the degree at 375 ovens
Step 6: Take 3 more whiskeys
of drink
Step 7: Turn oven the on
Step 8: Take 4 whisks of drinky
Step 9: Turk the bastey
Step 10: Whiskey another bottle of get
Step 11: Stick a turkey in the thermometer
Step 12: Glass yourself a pour of whiskey
Step 13: Bake the whiskey for 4 hours
Step 14: Take the oven out of the turkey
Step 15: Take the oven out of the turkey
Step 16: Floor the turkey up off the pick
Step 17: Turk the carvey
Step 18: Get yourself another scottle of botch
Step 19: Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey
Step 20: Bless the saying, pass and eat out

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Kathys Comments

GOD BLESS, HUGS DIANA.

We never have enough time for anything!

Things to Do to Liven Up Thanksgiving Dinner

1. Load your plate up high, then take it to the kitchen, toss it all in the blender, and take your "shake" back to the table. Announce that it's the new Thanksgiving Weight Loss Shake.

2. When everyone goes around to say what they are Thankful for, say, "I'm thankful I didn't get caught" and refuse to say anything more.

3. Bring along old recorded football games, pop them in the VCR when Dad's not looking. Make sure it is set to the last two minutes of the game. When he comes into the room, turn off the VCR and turn on the regular TV.

4. Bring a date that only talks about the tragic and abusive conditions known to exist at turkey farms.

5. During mid-meal turn to mom and say, "See mom, I told you they wouldn't notice that the Turkey was past expiration date. You were worried for nothing."

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The man who forgot to buy a turkey for ThanksgivingThe man who forgot to buy a turkey for Thanksgiving

It's the day before Thanksgiving, and the butcher is just locking up when a man begins pounding on the front door.

'Please let me in, 'says the man desperately. 'I forgot to buy a turkey, and my wife will kill me if I don't come home with one.'

'Okay, 'says the butcher.' Let me see what I have left.' He goes into the freezer and discovers that there's one last scrawny turkey left. He brings it out to show the man.

'That's one is too skinny. What else you got?' says the man.

The butcher takes the bird back into the freezer and waits a few minutes and brings the same turkey back out to the man.

'Oh, no, 'says the man, 'That one doesn't look any better. You better give me both of them!'

HORSE IN THE HOUSE
Joe was trying to lead a horse in the street, but was having much trouble getting the horse’s cooperation. A passerby stopped and asked if he could help. Joe was grateful and gladly accepted.

After much pushing and shoving, they finally got the horse to the front door of Joe’s apartment. Joe indicated that the horse was to go through the door. More pushing and shoving.

Once inside, Joe and the passerby managed to work the horse up the steps and into Joe’s apartment on the third floor, then through the living room and into the bathtub.

Wiping the sweat from his brow, the good Samaritan said, “I don’t want to be nosy, but this is most unusual…”

Joe said, “When my wife comes home, she’ll look in the bathroom and say, ‘There’s a horse in there!’ “

“Hey, how many times in a man’s life will they ever get the chance to tell their wife, ‘I know! I know!’?”

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A man in Jacksonville calls his son in San Diego the day before Thanksgiving and says, “I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.

“Pop, what are you talking about?” the son screams. We can’t stand the sight of each other any longer,” the father says. “We’re sick of each other, and I’m sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Denver and tell her.”

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. “Like heck they’re getting divorced,” she shouts, “I’ll take care of this,” > She calls Jacksonville immediately, and screams at her father, “You are NOT getting divorced. Don’t do a single thing until I get there. I’m calling my brother back, and we’ll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don’t do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?” and hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. “Okay,” he says, “they’re coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way.”

Doctor Dave had slept with one of his patients and felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he just couldn't. The guilt and sense of betrayal was overwhelming. But every once in a while he'd hear an internal, reassuring voice in his head that said:

"Dave, don't worry about it. You aren't the first medical practitioner to sleep with one of their patients, and you won't be the last. And you're single. Just let it go, Dave."

But invariably another voice in his head would bring him back to reality, whispering:

"Dave... Dave... Dave, you sick bastard. You're a vet."

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An elderly man was at home, dying in bed. He smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate chip cookies baking. He wanted one last cookie before he died...

He fell out of bed, crawled to the landing, rolled down the stairs, and crawled into the kitchen where his wife was busily baking cookies. With waning strength he crawled to the table and was just barely able to lift his withered arm to the cookie sheet. As he grasped a warm, moist, chocolate chip cookie, his favorite kind, his wife suddenly whacked his hand with a spatula.

"Why?" he whispered. "Why did you do that?"

"They're for the funeral," she replied.

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Kathys Comments

Things that sound dirty at thanksgiving but aren't
====================

* Whew, that's one terrific spread!
* I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.
* Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
* Talk about a huge breast!
* It's Cool Whip time!
* If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!
* Are you ready for seconds yet?
* Are you going to come again next time?
* It's a little dry. Do you still want to eat it?
* Just wait your turn, you'll get some!
* Don't play with your meat.
* Just spread the legs open and stuff it in.
* Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?
* I didn't expect everyone to come at once!
* You still have a little bit on your chin.
* Use a nice smooth stroke when you whip it.
* How long will it take after you stick it in?
* You'll know it's ready when it pops up.
* Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!
* How many are coming?
* That's the biggest one I've ever seen!
* Just lay back & take it easy...I'll do the rest.
* How long do I beat it before it's ready?

damnnnnnnn i missed u where have u been i know i dont have that much inbox that u got lost lol.. sweety i loveeee ur page how did u set it up like that?:) did u go see if my music goes good with my page of shud i change it?? let me know in aa flirt plz hun i really wanna know whAT u think ur opinion is important to me=].

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